I am fairly certain that a lot of women in this world have found themselves in very similar situations with men. You meet a man and you are somewhat interested in him. He is charming and so you decide to actually give him a chance. He is persistent and you like that. The two of you make plans to go out on a date and you have a lot of fun with him. Sparks seem to be flying left and right.
You know that the two of you have a real connection and you want to be able to build on it. As time goes by, you get more and more comfortable in each other’s company. And you genuinely start to think to yourself that maybe he’s the guy you’ve been waiting for all this time.
How most women react when they’ve been ghosted
If you’ve been there, it’s not your fault. Any man who ghosts a woman isn’t emotionally mature enough for a relationship, so it’s no big loss.
However, when you’re in this situation, it’s hard to think logically. You might start thinking things like “What’s wrong with me?” or “Why do I drive men away?”
Instead of moving on, you spend hours over-analyzing his behavior. You might put your love life on hold, waiting for him to come to his senses and come back to you.
Most women take a long time – time that could have been spent having fun with other men – obsessing over a man that doesn’t want them.
To make matters worse, they often fall into the trap of sending messages and leaving desperate voicemails. In case you didn’t already know, this approach doesn’t work.
How strong women handle rejection
When a strong woman realizes that a guy just isn’t into her, she makes it a priority to move on. She doesn’t sacrifice her dignity by bombarding him with calls and messages.
She allows herself to feel sad and disappointed for a few days, then reminds herself that there are other guys out there who will be a better match.
Strong women are unafraid to pull the plug on a relationship if they feel undervalued. For example, if a strong women is dating a guy who has stopped making an effort during their dates she takes a step back and appraises the situation.
She takes stock of the relationship, and ends it gracefully if a man isn’t meeting her needs.
There’s no need to wait for a man to cut you off or dump you. If it’s not working out, you need to put yourself first and leave. You don’t owe him a lengthy explanation.
Strong women approach dating with an attitude of abundance. They know that there is someone out there for everyone. If one man decides that he doesn’t want to pursue a relationship, there are still dozens more she can date.
Even if you did force him to talk, you may never get answers
Lots of women are obsessed with the idea of “closure.” They try to get answers from the man who rejected them. Unfortunately, most men have no interest in dissecting a relationship with their exes, especially if the relationship was short-lived.
Not only that, but they may not be able to answer you anyway.
He might know that he didn’t want to be with you, yet struggle to articulate why. Attraction and human behavior are both somewhat mysterious.
Think about it. You probably don’t understand your own motives some, or even most, of the time. Why assume that he has the self-awareness needed to give you the answers?
Remember, if he’s so emotionally immature that he abandons you without explanation, he probably isn’t capable of an honest conversation about his innermost feelings anyway.
It’s up to you to find the strength to move on
The good news is that the power to move on lies in your hands. You don’t need anyone’s permission or heart-to-heart conversations with an ex.
Choose to look forward, not back, and reframe the experience as a chance to learn how to cope when relationships don’t work out as you wanted.
The media likes to glorify people and characters who refuse to give up on love. We grow up surrounded by warped ideas about commitment. Films, TV, novels, and magazines all urge us to fight for our relationships, even if they aren’t going well.
Don’t fall into this trap. Strong women know that this portrayal of relationships is unrealistic, and that real love is a two-way street.
Follow their example, and you are much more likely to find someone who truly cares for you.